Second Chances
by NearlyMellow
Summary: (YAOI)- What would you do if you had a second chance? After Matt is killed Mello asks for a second chance and to have Matt back in his life and after he swears to change everything about the life they had, his wish is granted and he wakes up to the morning before Matt is killed, determined to keep the only person he has ever loved he sets out to change their lives for the better
1. Chapter 1

_Oh God another Fan-Fic lol. For some reason, even though I have 3 others I am trying to update I keep getting these Idea's in my head and I end up writing another fan fictions I just can't stop myself so at the risk of over working myself I have started this one- Luckily for me I have a week off of work so I can keep updating but I have a lot to write in a week but it keeps me busy. I just want to say beforehand thank you to anyone who favorites, follows or reviews honestly the moment I see that first 1 beside it I can't help but smiling, I know it's weird but even if one person likes what I write it keeps me happy as pie and encourages me to keep writing and updating. Anyway those of you who are interested my disclaimer is in my profile and also if you have any requests for a new Death Note or Bleach Yaoi fan-fc please feel free to PM me with what you are after and I will do my best, Thanks again xx K Quinn_

Mello ran his hand over the pillow, the scent of stale cigarettes tied in with that natural sweet aroma of his skin crept up into his nose and that smell alone bought on more tears of deep despair and sadness. Matt had been gone for a little over two weeks and yet the pain was still as fresh as if it had happened that very day. Mello never meant for Matt to be killed, it was something that even though there was a high risk of it happening he never imagined that the quiet and adorable red head would be the one that ended up being dead and Mello never imagined he would be the one left alone in the world with nothing and no one.

They had been best friends since they were just children growing up side by side in an Orphanage for gifted children. They were complete opposites, everybody thought so and no one could ever really understand how they got along or how they managed to remain close for the next twelve years. Matt was always quiet, at least in comparison to the blonde. He didn't like the outdoors and he spent most of his time immersed into a video game, even as he got older he still played video games with a cigarette hanging from his lips, hands covered with long black gloves and his emerald eyes protected by white goggles with orange lenses. Mello had always thought his best friend was just a big dorky nerd but he still loved everything about him.

Mello was always loud and had anger issues, emotionally unstable but was a genius. The older they got the closer they became and when they left the orphanage to start a life in the underground crime business they were no longer just child hood friends, they were lovers.

Mello was always nasty towards people; he saw them all like untrained dogs. He didn't have time for bullshit and his only goal was to become the best he could be, he wanted to be feared and he wanted people to be intimidated by him, and they were. Everyone saw the beast that he exuded, the hard assessed monster that nobody saw as any different and the only person who ever bothered to see past it all was Matt. He was completely loyal to Mello, he never complained or told the blonde what he could and couldn't do, he never battered an eyelid at the choices Mello made and what was the most remarkable thing was no matter how many times the blonde tried to push him away Matt would not budge.

Mello knew he was an asshole even towards Matt, there wasn't even an excuse for the way he treated him especially since no matter what the reason whenever Mello needed him Matt was there to do whatever the blonde asked of him and he was also the only one that ever cared about him and loved him.

Mello could feel the sting in his heart as he thought about how good the red head was to him and bad he treated him, he never even told Matt that he had loved him even though he did, with every part of him. He could feel the constant flow of warm tears trickling down his face; it hurt more than anything he had been injured by before. The large burn he received down the left side of his face and shoulder was nothing compared to the darkness he had in his heart, it was all his fault that Matt was dead and he didn't even get to say goodbye.

The red head had been helping him on the Kira case and he had asked Matt to create a diversion so that Mello could kidnap Takada, someone the blonde knew was tied in with Kira. However not everything had gone according to plan, Matt had been chased by the police after he released a smoke grenade and eventually he was stopped at a road block, Mello wasn't entirely sure of the details but knowing what Matt was like he did nothing that warranted him being shot and killed several times over by the Japanese Police.

Mello was enraged when he had found out what had happened to Matt, he wanted to brutally murder every single last person that was involved in Matt's death, his emotions were running high and he wanted to see them all suffer but when he realized that his lover had died because of him and that was what stopped Mello from fucking up his life and winding up behind bars instead of solving the Kira case.

He was completely lost without Matt by his side. Even after the years of verbal abuse, the fact that Mello never showed or said how much he loved him, even after the times he cried on Matt's shoulders and then pushed him away because he didn't want to admit he had let someone into his heart Matt still told him every day that he loved him and the blonde felt nothing but hatred towards himself because not only did he lead Matt into a life completely devoid of light he also treated him like he was just another person when he wasn't he was the love of Mello's life and now he was without him and there was nothing he could do.

He turned over and looked out the window; his eyes were slightly blurred and hazy from the tears that continuously flowed. He focused on the midnight sky that was littered with what looked like tiny stars glittering in the clear black night. He smiled to himself as he remembered something Matt had said when they were younger and still at the orphanage

_"How many stars do you think would be in the entire universe' Mello asked the younger boy sitting beside him on the bed as they gazed out into the sky_

_"I dunno it wouldn't matter anyway' Matt replied_

_'Why?"_

_'Because no matter how many stars there are nothing would ever be as beautiful as you are and no amount of anything will be as much as I love you"_

Matt had always said cheesy stuff to him, mostly to make him smile but he only ever did when Matt wasn't looking.

Mello continued to look out into the night

'I know that you can't hear me and I know that it would be impossible but if you came back to me I would change it all Matt. I would tell you that I love you and I would take us both far away where things would be different, somewhere I wouldn't lose you again. You're the only one that really knew me Matty and you are the only one who ever cared about me and loved me and I miss you so fucking much"

Mello could feel the tears starting to flow from his eyes once again as he held onto the pillow that smelled of the red head and the cigarettes he used to smoke. Mello didn't want to let go of the only thing he had that was as close to the red head that he could get. He wished more than anything he could have Matt back because he would really change, everything. He would give it all up just to have the only person he every cared about and loved in his life, he would be nicer towards him, he would tell him that he loved him and he would give him the life he deserved and not the one he died because of the way he lived it.

'Matt…please if there was ever such a thing as miracles just come back to me ok, I need you and I am so sorry, I never meant for you to be killed just come back to me and I will make it different for us" Mello cried out again

He pressed his face into the pillow and sobbed loudly until he fell asleep in a pool of tears and Matt's scent.

Mello shifted in the bed as the sun began to beam golden bands in his face. He hated the morning sun especially since it looked so damn cheery and he was so damn miserable. As he stretched he could smell that he desperately needed a shower and after four days of unable to move from the bed he needed something to eat and drink. He hated that the pain in his heart didn't fade, it was a constant nagging that reminded him that when he would enter the kitchen he wouldn't see Matt sitting there drinking coffee even too strong for caffeine addicts and smoking his fifth cigarette for that morning. He managed to drag himself to the bathroom and turn on the shower taps, normally there would already be a clean white towel sitting on the sink for him to use that Matt would have put out for him as he entered the bathroom he suddenly paused and frowned at the towel that was left folded on the sink, Matt must have left it there on the morning before he was killed. Mello smiled weakly

The red head was always taking care of him in one way or another even though Mello didn't need it or want it Matt was always doing sweet things that he never really appreciated like he should have. He would go to the store to buy cigarettes and always come back with more chocolate for Mello and stack them in the refrigerator with the rest. He always left a coffee mug out with a teaspoon of coffee and three teaspoons of sugar in it so all Mello would have to do was pour the water that was already boiled into the mug and stir it. It was even those simple things that the blonde missed the most about Matt, he desperately wanted to say thank you to the red head for everything he ever done and how much he did truly love him.

He showered quickly and wrapped the towel that still felt warm around his waist and began to leave the bathroom and stepped inside the bedroom

"Mel's there is someone on the phone for you" He heard Matt's voice

"Yeah, I'll be there in a minute"

It was only after he replied that he realized he had just answered to Matt's voice. He felt his heart skip a beat and he looked up to see the red head he loved rummaging through the wardrobe they kept their clothes in. He stood their completely paralyzed, he had to be hallucinating because there was no way that Matt was standing there. He watched as the emerald eyed nineteen year old turned around

"Everything ok?" He heard the figure say

Mello couldn't move, he couldn't even say anything. He didn't know what was happening but it couldn't be real, there was no possibility that he was really looking at HIS Matt.

"…Matt?" He finally uttered as he continued to look at the man on the other side of the room

He watched as the red head smiled

"Yeah…it's me, Matt" He replied

Mello swiftly reached for the 9mm that sat on his bedside desk and aimed it up the man's head. He didn't know who this person was but it wasn't Matt

"I DON'T KNOW WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE BUT YOU BETTER GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE BEFORE I KILL YOU!" Mello yelled loudly, his steady hands aiming the barrel in between the red heads eyes

He watched Matt lift up his arms in a surrender gesture

"Whoa, Mello…It's me, it's Matt' The red head remarked calmly

"NO YOUR FUCKING NOT, MATT IS DEAD I SAW IT FOR MYSELF, MATT WAS KILLED, YOU ARE NOT MATT!" Mello yelled again

He watched as the red head took a step closer to him

"DON'T FUCKING MOVE, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?"

'Mel's it's me, I don't know what kind of dream you had but I'm right here, I'm not dead. It's really me Mello, just put the gun down…I'm right here"

Mello could hear his voice was exactly the same, it was that smooth and calming purr that never sounded angry or scared, the same mellow drone that never became emotional or distressed. It sounded like Matt and looked exactly like Matt but the blonde knew there was no way that it could be him, he buried his best friend he saw the coffin go into the ground there was no possible way for it to be him

"MATT DIED! I FUCKING BURIED HIM MYSELF I DIDN'T HALLUCINATE IT, I SAW IT WITH MY OWN TWO EYES YOU CAN'T BE HIM"

Mello watched as the red head took another step towards him and then another. He couldn't even pull the trigger, whoever it was, was Matt in every way, he even smelled like him and the blonde would have never shot the red head no matter how angry he was so he couldn't even pull the trigger on the imposter standing before him.

He watched the red head reach out for the gun and gently pried it away from the blonde's hands.

"Hey it's ok, whatever you dreamed Mello it wasn't real I am Matt, the same Matt you grew up with. I am ok I am not dead"

'If you really are Matt then tell me something he would only know"

"Well we grew up together in Wammy's Orphanage for Gifted Children; we've known each other since I was seven and you were eight we-"

"ANYONE CAN FIND THAT SHIT OUT TELL ME SOMETHING ONLY MATT AND I WOULD KNOW!" Mello yelled angrily

"Ok, you really love fucking doggy style and you hate it when I call you babe or baby and for Near's twelfth birthday you made him a chocolate cake that you filled with laxatives but forgot you did that and you ended up eating it and you were in the bathroom for three days"

Mello looked at the red head with shock in his eyes, there was no way anyone else would have known that since Matt was the only one who did

"…Matt? that's really you?" Mello asked still completely bewildered by the fact he was really looking at the red head

Matt smiled and nodded his head before placing the gun down on the bed

"Yeah Mel's it's really me"

Mello fell into the red head and wrapped his arms tightly around him, holding him close to his body. It really was Matt, the same Matt he grew up with, was best friends with and the same one he loved

"I asked for you to come back and you did…you came back to me" Mello whispered as he fought back the tears of joy, he couldn't explain it and he didn't really want to he had Matt back in his life and he was never going to let him go

He pulled away from the red head and placed his hands on his cheeks, he didn't even care that his breath smelled like cigarettes and strong coffee.

"What did I ask you to do today?" Mello questioned still trying to make sense of it all

'You asked me to create a diversion while you kidnap Takada right?" Matt asked hoping he had remembered it correctly

'So it hasn't happened yet?" Mello asked

Matt shook his head and then looked at the clock on the wall

"No but we should probably get going soon it won't be long until it's go time" He replied

"NO!" Mello suddenly yelled out

He made a promise that if Matt came back to him that he would change everything so the red head didn't end up dead and he was going to make good on that promise. He had the only person he loved back in his life and he was not going to make the mistake of screwing it up again, he was going to be the person he should have been towards his lover and he was going to make sure that he changed history. It wasn't about trying to catch Kira and it wasn't about beating Near anymore it was about living the life they should have lived and it was about Mello holding on to the one thing ever gave him hope and that was Matt.

"No?" Matt questioned

"No, we aren't worrying about the Kira case anymore, it's over Kira can go fuck himself, Near can deal with it, we have something else to do" Mello spat out quickly

He could see the look of confusion in Matt's eyes. Mello was not going to be able to explain everything he wanted to, to Matt, he couldn't even comprehend it so there was no way the red head was going to be able to

'So…you don't want to catch Kira anymore?" Matt asked trying to make sense of what the blonde was saying to him

"No, I don't care about it anymore; we should just go away somewhere, just you and me. Fuck off out of this place; I don't care where we go just anywhere but here. We can just disappear and leave all this behind. We have money and a car so let's just go Matt, let's just go"

He watched Matt smile and Mello took him into his arms again and breathed in his scent. He wasn't sure what kind of God graced him with the love of his life but he was extremely grateful he had the opportunity to change life for the both of them and he was going to take it and make something better for them. Even if the money was stolen he didn't care, it wasn't like he gave a shit about conformities anyway. He didn't know why someone would give him back the one thing that mattered when he lost it, he didn't know what he had done so right but he wasn't going to question it he had Matt back like he had wished and whatever miracle it was he was going to make good on his word.


	2. Chapter 2

_Seriously you guys are so fucking awesome! thank you so much for your reviews and I love you stalkers so much lol! _

Mello sat looking at Matt from across the table. He didn't know how any of it was possible but he really was right there, in front of him. The blonde had no idea how the hell he was going to be able to be the guy that Matt would want. He didn't know how to be nice or calm, he didn't know how to stop from over reacting and he didn't know how to show that he loved someone. He would have once rather died then show any kind of affection other than a hug, as for sex, well Mello just saw it as that, sex it didn't have an emotional meaning it was just fucking and that was it. He knew he was going to have to change and he knew that it was going to take a lot for him to be someone that he wasn't used to being but he wasn't going to go back on his word, he didn't care where they went as long as they escaped the Kira case and everything thing that came with it, Mello wanted to protect Matt and that was the only way he could see it happening.

"Mel's?" Matt said calmly ad he looked up into the blondes light blue eyes

'Yeah?"

"I'm not complaining or anything like that but...you seem a little...off, like your not yourself. Are you sure everything is ok?" the red head asked with concern

"Yeah, I just don't do this Kira shit anymore, Near can do whatever the hell he likes with it it's not my concern anymore. We just need to get away, leave all this behind and start again"

'I wouldn't argue with you about that, but are you sure you really want to just leave? You were so hell bent on beating Near to the finishing line and catching Kira yourself"

"I'M FUCKING SURE!"

Mello closed his eyes and took a deep breath, he knew it wasn't going to be long before he snapped. He had tried so damn hard not to yell and yet he couldn't help but over react when Matt pushed the same point. The red head very rarely got on Mello's nerves but when he did normally Mello would spare no mercy.

"...Sorry...I am sure that's what I want Matt. I made a promise and I'm going to keep it. I wont go back on my word" Mello replied before getting up from off the chair and walked into the kitchen

He rested over the sink and bowed his head to catch his breath. He had the sensation of wanting to be sick pooling in his stomach. This was a major thing he had to deal with and he didn't know how he was supposed to handle it. He didn't know if he was going to wake up in the morning and Matt was going to be gone again, he didn't know if it was all a figment of his imagination if it was for just one day that he had with Matt then he didn't want to waste it, he wanted to spend what time he had left with him no being angry or temperamental he wanted to find out what his red head would really want to do. He pulled away from the sink and looked back and the emerald eyed young man, he couldn't help but smile slightly, those goggles he had over his eyes Mello always thought they kinda suited him but he wanted to see Matt's eyes. They were sweet and almost innocent looking they always had been and even though both their souls were slightly tainted those emerald orbs never lost their purity. He ambled over to his lover and grasped hold of the eyewear and gently pulled them away from Matt's eyes and placed them down on the table.

"I can't exactly explain what has happened without sounding like I have lost my mind but I really need you to just trust me. I don't know how long this is going to last so even if it's just for today I want to just be with you. I know that doesn't sound like me and you probably think I am on something but if you had the chance to make our lives different would you take it?" Mello asked looking into Matt's green eyes

"I don't regret being with you Mello but if I had the chance to change the way we lived and what we lived to do than yes I would" He replied

"Good, I'm glad you said that. So in that case if you could spend just one day with me doing whatever you wanted to do, no matter what it was, what would you want to do with me?"

He waited for an answer. He could see that Matt was thinking about it, clearly there were many things running through the red head's mind, Mello had just hoped that he wasn't going to say something stupid like sit in front of the television all day playing video games, he knew that Matt hated the outdoors so there was probably no chance he would want to go anywhere.

'I would want to go somewhere where no one knew where we were. I wouldn't care what we did just as long as it didn't involve chasing after criminals and risking our lives. I guess I would want it to be like it used to be before we left the orphanage. We used to have fun and we didn't have to worry about whether we were going to die the next day...I'd be happy just to have you for the entire day without you needing to be somewhere else"

Mello looked at his lover curiously, it somewhat surprised him that he didn't actually suggest a whole day of gaming and he didn't mention anything about not wanting to be outdoors

"So even if it meant we were outdoors doing something normal you wouldn't care as long as you were with me?" Mello asked

He watched the red head nod

'Although I mean staying inside and having you in bed with me sounds like a pretty good idea" Matt smiled almost cheekily

Mello shook his head, that much was predictable.

"Ok so if I said to you let's go to the country somewhere and just spend the day outside doing something normal people would do and then afterwards make good use out of the back seat of the car, you would be all for that?"

"Sounds good to me, Mello I do trust you but this is really strange, why are you suddenly being so nice to me?" Matt questioned

Mello couldn't explain it to him or want to waste time trying to tell the red head what was going on but he needed to say something, anything that would stop Matt asking questions Mello couldn't answer because he didn't know how to.

"If I died, wouldn't you regret the way we lived our lives together? wouldn't you want something better for us? a life so completley different from the one we lived?" He asked

"Yes I would"

"Then that's all you need to know. No need to waste time with pointless chatter, we got shit to do so let's go"

It felt strange being in the drivers seat of Matt's '69 Road Runner 383 and actually having Matt in the passenger seat. The blonde had been driving the car instead of his motorbike because everything about the red and black classic reminded him of the red head and it felt warm and safe and now that Matt was sitting beside him, feet resting up on the dashboard, unlit cigarette resting between his lips, goggles over his eyes and slumped in the seat in his typical lazy and laid back fashion it was possible the most calming thing Mello had ever experienced. He couldn't help but keep looking to the side as he drove just to make sure Matt was still there and he hadn't suddenly vanished.

'I never hated you or despised you" Matt suddenly said breaking the silence that they sat in

"I never said you did" Mello replied

"Yeah I know but I bet you have thought it. I can't say that I have exactly enjoyed our life together these past few years but I don't regret it entirely. The only reason why I did anything you asked me to do was because I just wanted to be with you and make you proud. I wanted you to have someone that you knew you could trust completley. I didn't care if you yelled at me or insulted me because I love you and I knew what you were like before I fell in love with you so nothing you did ever bothered me"

Mello felt a flutter in his heart that he had never felt before. He had always assumed the Matt would end up hating him one day or at the every least regretting the time they had together because of the blondes attitude and the way he treated people. It was somewhat endearing to hear that Matt say he was never bothered by and Mello believed him. Matt never lied to him he was always faithful and loyal and he did trust him above anyone else.

'How is it possible that you can love me Matt? You know I am not someone people even like let alone love" Mello asked with a smile

He wasn't so naive to believe that everyone admired him or thought well of him. He pissed people off and got under others skin he didn't think twice about disposing of someone that betrayed him or tried to fool him in any manner. He was ill tempered and didn't really give a fuck about the well being of anyone except himself and Matt. He knew he wasn't the kind of guy people could fall in love with.

'Because I know the Mello that nobody else knows and behind those walls there is someone actually kind hearted and warm and despite the fact you have never say it I am confident that you feel something for me that goes beyond friendship"

"You are right, I do feel something for you that goes beyond friendship" Mello replied

He hadn't said it at all during their time together and now that he had Matt back in his life he wasn't going to hold back and end up regretting his second chance, especially since he didn't know how long he had Matt for, he didn't know if it was temporary or if it was for the rest of their lives but he went on with the assumption of twenty four hours and hoped that it would be much longer.

They got outside of the city and into the country and already everything seemed peaceful and quiet, definitely something Mello was not used to. He pulled off to the side of the road and exited the car and looked out over the lake and stone bridge they had stopped to the side of. He was soon joined by Matt and both of them just stared at the silence. There was nothing more than birds chirping and the slight rustle of the trees as a gentle breeze swept through. The blonde removed his sun glasses and looked at the red head

He didn't say anything except smiled and began to make his way down to the river to get a closer look at the water. He was sure Matt was feeling uncomfortable with being outside but this was almost too good to be true, it was quiet, calming and it looked like they were on another planet, it was so different to the city that Mello was sure there was no way Matt could hate it entirely. He crouched down and removed the glove from his hand before resting his palm and fingers in the slightly cool but very clean looking water. He stood up again and began to strip off his clothing. He could see Matt just staring at him almost in bewilderment

"Well? are you coming in or what?" Mello asked the red head

"In there? Mello you don't even know what's in there"

'Fuck me, when did you start worrying over the small stuff Matt? the waters nice, the sun is hot who gives a fuck what's in here, come on don't be such a bitch" Mello said somewhat commandingly

He tossed his sleeveless shirt to the ground and Matt smiled before shaking his head and began to remove his boots. They both quickly undressed down to their boxer shorts. Mello couldn't even remember the last time he went swimming but the moment his body was immersed in the water every thing that he was ever worried about was suddenly washed away. He turned around and faced Matt, the red head seemed just as much at peace as Mello was and it was a good feeling to have not worrying about anything except just being together.

He looked into Matt's eyes and smiled as he moved closer to him. He elevated his hand and pushed some of the damp vermillion strands away from his forehead before leaning into him and pressing his lips against Matt's and began to kiss him slowly and passionately. He could feel Matt wrap his arms around his slender body and pull him into him, they held each other closely as their lips and tongues collided in a zealous and sensual embrace.

.


	3. Chapter 3

Mello pulled away from the kiss and stared into the emerald pools before him. To feel Matt holding him was something he would never feel again. He was still not sure how it was possible that he was able to turn back the hands of time, whatever it was that allowed him to do he figured it was a one off miracle that would never happen again so while he had the red head with him he wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to spend what time he could just being with him

Even if it was just for twenty-four hours and Mello would go back to hunting down Kira and simultaneously proving once and for all he was L's rightful successor but for that time he wasn't worried about anything else except that someone had looked favourably down upon and given him back the one thing he cherished above everything else.

"I think we should go back to the car" Mello said to the red head with an almost wicked smile

He didn't need to make it any clearer for the younger male, he knew exactly what Mello was talking about. Matt nodded in agreement and they made their way out of the water and back onto dry land, collecting their clothes and walking back to the car. Mello could feel the wet fabric sticking to his legs and there was no way of hiding the fact that both of them had become semi-erect during the time that their lips were locked together in a sweet and divine embrace.

That stopped at the vehicle and they both placed their clothes onto the passenger side seat. The blonde took another look at the red head and suddenly pushed hard on his shoulders and pinned him up against the car before taking his mouth with his own. Their lips brushed against one anothers ceaselessly, the soft pillows collided and encased them in a heated and decadent dance of lust and love. He could hear a faint yet erotic moan provoking Mello to push his tongue in between the red heads tender and moist lips and slide it against Matt's own slick muscle.

He placed his hands on the waist band of Matt's soaked boxer shorts and as he continued to kiss him with a wild and intense hunger he slipped his right hand passed the elastic and grasped hold of the red heads engorged and heavy cock that lightly quivered at the touch of the blondes hand.

Mello disconnected the kiss and both of them gasped for air, their naked chests raising and falling speedily as their lungs strived to take in oxygen that they were both deprived of. He continued to ran his hand over his lovers cock as the wet material clung to the back of his hand making it rather difficult to do what he was set out to achieve

"Take them off" He said in a low seductive tone

He watched Matt give a smile of surprise and Mello removed his hand and watched intently as the red head did what he commanded him to do. They were out in the middle of nowhere, no sign of anyone around so there was no need for conformity or shyness. Matt removed his shorts from his body, flung the wet material on roof of the car to drive and proceeded to open the passenger side door and climbed over the seat and into the back, he made him self comfortable and looked at the blonde with wanting and flirty eyes

Mello could help but grin slightly and quickly removed his own shorts, placing them next to Matt's and then entering the car, pulling the door shut behind him. He climbed onto the red head who was laying down on the comfortable back seat, he placed his legs either side of Matt's and straddled him pressing their heated and slightly damp cocks together as he rested down into his chest.

'You do realize what we are doing is illegal?" Matt questioned as he pushed some of the golden strands back behind Mello's ears

"Why do you think I am doing it? I can't be completley pure Matt, I think you know that as well as I do" Mello replied

They remained silent for a moment and even though Mello desperately wanted to have Matt inside of him he couldn't help but continue to absorb himself in those stunning green eyes

"You know, I don't know what kind of dream you had but whatever it was I am glad you had it. This is really...more than I could have ever hoped Mello" Matt said softly to him

The blonde knew it wasn't a nightmare that he had. He knew that for a certainty Matt had died and he was back. He knew that it wasn't a figment of his imagination because the pain he felt in his heart after Matt died was very real and something that could not be simulated in a dream-like state of mind.

"If I told you that it wasn't a dream would you believe me?" He asked the red head who continued to stroke his hair

"Although it would be confusing you know I have never doubted you so anything you have to tell me Mello you know that I would believe you"

The blonde contemplated about telling Matt what he knew. He did know that Matt would never think he was full of shit or lying, he trusted the red head when he said he never doubted him but what he was concerned about is how exactly it would end up effecting his lover, would he ended up regretting being told the the truth? or would he let it slid off his shoulders and not effect him like most things didn't? Mello looked away from the emerald orbs for a brief moment. He had never kept anything from Matt before, he was the only person he was completley honest with.

"I don't know how it happened, that much I can't fathom. But you were killed after you let off a smoke bomb so that I could apprehend Takada, I found out soon after that you were killed when you were shot several times over by the Japanese Police. I ended up breaking into the morgue after they took your body and I saw for myself you were really dead. I stole your body and buried you the next day...It was the most painful thing I had ever gone through and I missed you so fucking much...I just wanted you back so I asked for it, time was rewound back to today, before you were killed so I could change it. I know I sound fucking mental but I'm telling you the truth Matt, I wanted you back so I could fix everything and you came back to me" Mello said

He almost instantly regretted saying what he had the moment the words finished coming out of his mouth. He knew he sounded crazy and actually saying the words made it seem all that more so, he sounded like he had finally snapped and was beginning to lose his marbles but he knew he was speaking the truth, he knew what had happened and he knew that it wasn't just his imagination.

He looked up and connected his eyes back with Matt's and he was surprised to see that the red head didn't look shocked or surprised in anyway which was instantly puzzling to Mello because if the positions were switched and Matt had just said what he had he would have seriously considered putting his lover in a mental corrections facility.

"Well that does sort of explain why I feel a little strange...but I do believe you Mello, I know you and I know when you are telling the truth and I can hear it in your voice you're not lying so I honestly believe what you're saying. No matter where I am, no matter what happens to me whether it is death or other wise I will always hear you. We aren't just two people, we've had a bond that's lasted over a decade and I am sure you can feel it to, whenever you really need me I just know and I will be there with you as soon as I can be...I'll always feel you and hear you" The red head replied

Mello could feel a tear leave each of his eyes. He could feel his heart pounding hard in his chest and his emotions were shifted into overdrive. He had spent twelve years with someone that truly did understand him, who never though ill of him or see him as something evil or horrible. Matt was the single most amazing being, other than himself, that he had known. He didn't want to be without him again but the pain was unbearable, the sadness was an overwhelming tidal wave that swallowed him and drowned him and he never wanted to feel like that again. Even if it was not his typical capricious behavior he didn't care Matt was the one thing his life he cared about, loved and wanted more than anything else.

"I love you Matt" Mello let the long awaited words slip from his lips as his tears cascaded and dripped onto the red head's chest

He watched Matt smile sweetly, it was the first time he was hearing those four words come from the blonde

"I love you too Mello"

He leaned into Matt and kissed him softly and slowly, melting into his body and being encased in the red heads worth. He didn't want it to end and he didn't want to leave. He felt the one thing he never thought he would ever acquire...true, unadulterated, peaceful happiness.


	4. Chapter 4

As Mello straddled the red heads hips he could feel Matt's lips litter moist and surreptitious kisses down the length of his neck and over his chest. He moaned robustly as he tangled his fingers in with Matt's vermillion strands and held him close to his body and he gently ground his hips against his lovers. The humid air wrapped around their bodies and began to fog the windows creating a block to the outside world that was just on the other side. The blonde could feel Matt's heart pounding hard against him and his smooth milk skin bunched into tiny goosebumps the more the red head caressed him tenderly. He pulled away from his boyfriend slightly and connected his light blue eyes with the emeralds as their gazes locked an intense and heated stare Mello reached behind him and grasped hold of the pulsating and taut member guiding it towards his entrance. He had felt like it had been years since he last slept with Matt, he was sure that it was going to be painful but he was strong he knew that the only pain he could never handle was the one he felt when Matt died everything else didn't affect him.

"Mello..."

"Shh...don't speak just let me do what I want to do"

He watched Matt smile and then close his lips tightly. He continue to edge his lovers cock closer towards his entrance and slowly he pushed it inside of him. The pain shot through his entire body and he could feel tears beginning to form in his eyes. His body ached and everything seemed to burn but he didn't care he was having sex with Matt even if it killed him. He gritted his teeth with force and impaled himself further down on the slightly slick and throbbing length.

He could hear Matt let out a muffled moan that he tried to contain. The blonde could feel his muscle walls tightening and releasing around the thick member he had managed to swallow the complete length and the moment Matt's cock was buried deep inside of him the pain started to fade and pleasure was slowly surfacing.

Mello took a deep breath in and out and began to rock his hips against the red heads. The younger male place his hands onto the older's waist and aided in the smooth movements, he lightly bit into his bottom lip as he could feel his lovers manhood slip in and out of his stretched warmth.

"I meant what I said" Mello said quietly as he could feel Matt slightly buck his hips upwards

The red head didn't reply, he just smiled knowing he wasn't allowed to speak. Instead he placed a finger against the blondes chest and began to trace his finger along the sleek and insipid yet lustrous skin and wrote out the words

_I know_

Mello couldn't help but grin as they continued to make love in the back seat of the car. It wasn't the blondes preferred position but he had to make do and he wasn't sure that he was going to be able to stop himself and hold out until they got home or wherever they were going to be going.

Both of them began panting heavily and the air around them became more intense and heated. The windows were tainted with steam and condensation cascaded down the glass in slow trickles. The blonde could feel the warmth of his orgasm beginning to form in his stomach, with every passing second the thrusting became harder and faster and both bodies became moist with perspiration. Matt pressed his lips to the blondes neck again and lapped at the sweat that rolled down his skin.

"...Matt..." Mello called out

The red head pulled his mouth away from his boyfriends flesh and looked up into the aquamarine pools. Mello was always grateful that he didn't have to say anything to Matt when it came to asking what he wanted. Somehow Matt always knew exactly what the blonde wanted in a specific moment so when the red head wrapped his hand around Mello's neglected cock the blonde moaned not just in pleasure but in relief.

He could feel his lovers hand glide over his shaft and then softly caressed his engorged and weeping head. He panted out heavily as each thrust and rocking of their hips along with Matt's palm jerking him off hard and fast was bringing him closer and closer to the point of release

'I fucking love you" Mello moaned in between the harsh panting

As the words left his mouth he could hear Matt let out a loud cry of lustfulness.

He could feel his cock tighten and the heat from inside spill onto the red heads stomach and chest. He took deep breaths in and out as five consecutive streams hit the flesh. As he rode out his orgasm he could feel Matt suddenly release inside of him, his walls contracting and draining the heat of the white liquid out of his boyfriend.

That sat still together and Mello looked down at Matt's chest and smiled

'Are you just going to leave that there?" The blonde asked

Matt looked down at the mess and looked back up into the blonde's eyes

"Can I talk now?" He whispered

"Yes Matt you can talk now"

"Well I don't have anything to wipe it off with"

The blonde smile and placed his finger against the very small pools of white and scooped it up. He placed his finger against the red head's lips and Matt opened up his mouth before his boyfriend rubbed his finger over the younger male's tongue.

"Taste good?" Mello asked

"The best"


	5. Chapter 5

_Hello lovely reviewers/ followers/ favouriters many kisses and lots of love for you, so I am having issues with my internet so unfortunately I can't update as quickly as I would like to and with only four days left of my holiday from work I have heaps to write so this is going to be fun lol. Please excuse the short chapters (that includes any other of my fics you are reading) as I am trying to update and getting it done as quickly as possible in the frame of time my net is working xx K Quinn_

As night fell they had gone back to their home. Mello had a sinking sensation in his heart that what had happened would soon be over. He couldn't deny it he missed causing trouble and creating destruction, it was just something he felt he was born to do but at the same time the day he had spent with Matt was possibly the most calming and relaxing thing he had ever done and it was as simple as taking a swim in a lake in the country side and having sex in the back seat of the car, it wasn't much but it was truly something remarkable for them both.

Mello lay with his arm draped over Matt's naked chest and his head was nestled on his small bicep muscle. He could feel the red head running his fingers through the golden blonde strands and stroking them gently. It was strange having him lie beside him in the bed that they shared, Mello had forgotten how good it truly felt just to be lazing down with his lover, quietly and listening only to the sounds of light breathing.

"It's strange…I feel like I have spent forever chasing demons, some physically existing and other's metaphorically speaking and then when I finally stop and stay still, not worrying about anything except just breathing, it is rather remarkable how much I miss that life…I guess that sounds rather selfish really doesn't it?" Mello asked Matt almost in a tired and serene voice

Mello felt Matt press a soft and slow kiss into his hair

"No, it's not selfish. When something's been a part of you for so long it's reasonable to miss it…even if it's only after a short time…I never wanted you to stop doing what you love Mello, I have never wanted that. It's ok if you want to go back to it, I don't mind. Everything we did to today will keep me content for the rest of my life"

"I won't go back if it means you end up dead. I don't give a fuck about anything else, I can take care of myself but…if I don't take care of you I'll end up losing you"

The blonde moved his head and looked up into his boyfriends eyes. He meant what he had said, he was more than capable of looking after himself but he had also wanted to protect Matt, he did when they were kids and as young adults he wanted to do the same thing.

The red head pushed some of the loose strands behind the blonde's ear and ran his fingers down over the scarring on the left side of Mello's face.

"Mel's, I would rather die serving you than you give up on catching Kira when I know that's what you really want. I will be ok, you don't have to worry about looking after me"

"Don't you fucking dare tell me what I really want, what I really want is to be with you" Mello said in a low growl

He watched the red head smile

"Don't smile at me like that… I'm pissed off at you"

Mello continued to look at Matt and even though he was slightly annoyed at the red head, he didn't like people assuming how he felt, he couldn't be entirely mad at him. It was rather amusing to Mello that his boyfriend always smiled even when he was agitated.

"What if I wake up and you're really gone" The blonde asked himself rhetorically without even realizing he had said it out loud

"So what?' Matt replied

Mello quickly sat up and looked at the red head with shock in his eyes, if he wasn't angry before he certainly was now

'What the fuck do you mean so what? Have you even listened to a fucking word I have said? Or have you just been nodding and agreeing with me without really giving a shit"

He watched Matt sit up, gently grasp his arm and pull the blond back to him.

"I have heard you Mello but just listen, Would it really matter if you wake up and I am not here? You are a strong guy, you have been through many circles of hell and come out as a survivor. The day we had today was the most sane and relaxing day of my life. We didn't worry about watching over our shoulders, we weren't getting up to destroy something or threaten someone's life. You said yourself that you wanted the chance to make it right and you have, you've done what you promised' Matt replied

Mello calmed down and once again laid down with his boyfriend, lying close to his body. He could feel Matt's heart beating against the palm of his hand. The red did make sense; Mello had done exactly what he had promised he changed the future so Matt wouldn't have to die. They did spend a day together that was sane and relaxing, it wasn't much but it meant everything to them both.

"If this is all over when the sun rises I don't want you to be sad because we had a happy ending. The one thing we would have never had because of the way life is. Even if you wake up and I am not here all you have to do is say you need me and I promise I'll be back"

Mello looked into the emeralds, he could feel his eyes trying to expel the tears of sadness but he was able to hold them in

'How can you promise something like that? It sounds insane" Mello scoffed

"Because I know it's true…you asked me to trust you when you told me what happened to me and I am asking you to do the same…trust me that I will hear you and I will come to you in one way or another"

Mello lightly nodded his head. It was the least he could do since Matt believed him and his crazy story that sounded like it was pulled straight out of a movie. He placed his lips against the red heads and kissed him softly before moving back down and resting his head on Matt's chest. He closed his eyes and listened to the soft thumping of his boyfriends heart and slowly fell asleep knowing everything was going to be ok when he woke up.


	6. Chapter 6

Mello opened his eyes as the sun streamed in through the windows casting beams of gold on to his face. The moment he felt the rays of sunlight resting on his cheek he suddenly sat up and looked beside him, although the space beside him was empty he could still see the indentation of Matt's body in the mattress, he hoped that it wasn't his mind playing tricks on him. His heart started to beat irregularly and he felt the panic set in

'Please don't be gone" he whispered to himself

He quickly threw off the covers and raced into the kitchen, where Matt usually was if he wasn't in bed the next morning. His heart was pounding hard in his chest and he could feel his palms starting to sweat but the moment he saw the the red head standing beside the kettle, slumped over in a lazily fashion he couldn't help but run to him

"DON'T EVER SCARE ME LIKE THAT AGAIN ASSHOLE!" Mello yelled

He watched Matt turn around and smile sweetly at him. Mello threw himself into the red heads arms and held him close to his body, holding him tightly, not really wanting to let go.

"Ah...Mello, this is nice and all but you're kinda choking me"

He pulled away from his lover and looked into those emeralds, he couldn't believe that Matt was really there, that whatever happened was clearly permanent.

"I could get used to you being like this you know" Matt said with a large grin

"Hey! don't get too comfortable I'm not always going to be this nice..."

Mello hugged Matt again and rested his lips against his ear

"But I guess I could make an exception with you..." he continued

He felt Matt's hand on his back as he held him. Mello had never felt so relieved as he did in that moment. It was like a weight had been removed from him and he felt the gleam of victory that he had actually changed their lives for the better, neither of them were dead and they actually had something to look forward too.

"I told you everything would work out didn't I?" Matt question with a triumphant look on his face as he disconnected the hug but still held Mello close to his body.

'Hey don't get too fucking cocky, I am the one who made sure everything would be ok so the least you can do is say thank you"

"Thank you Mello" Matt said quietly as he pressed him lips up against the blondes and kissed him tenderly

Mello couldn't help but smile as Matt placed kisses onto him. Even after everything they had been through the red head was still obedient as he always was.

"So...what's the plan?" Matt questioned as he pulled away form the loving osculation

"Even though you were right, I did desperately want to be the one that bought down Kira but I think once Near finally gets hold of him it will only be because of my efforts so far. In the end without me he wouldn't have had a chance in hell in finding and catching Kira so ultimately I'm already better than him and in the end I would have achieved what I set out to do so there is no reason to be here anymore" Mello replied calmly

He pulled away from Matt and opened the refrigerator and retrieved a chocolate block and began to unwrap the foil before taking a large chunk from the right corner.

'That chapter of our lives is finished, neither of us had to die like dogs...in a way we served justice together... it could be worth pursuing, somewhere else away from Kira away from Near away from all this after all it doesn't matter where we go right? we are always going to raise some sort of hell" Mello said with his mouth full, swallowing and then smiling widely at his own comment

It was true, it was a case if they didn't follow trouble, trouble ended up following them

"We leave and cause trouble elsewhere?" Matt echoed

"Yeah...although this time let's not chase after a serial killer with a Death Note, let's keep it simple" Mello replied

He walked back over to Matt and draped his arms over the red head's shoulders still holding the block of chocolate.

"So the usual, knife-gun-chainsaw wielding idiot's with grudges?' The red head asked softly

"Sounds good to me, after all, better the devil you know"

Mello pursed his lips to Matt's once again and kissed him hungrily. He didn't know how it happened but he had been able to save Matt and himself from a life that was going to end in the worst possible away, he didn't know if it was magic or just a miracle that bought Matt back from death but whatever it was Mello couldn't have been happier.

_Well that's it guys, I did intend on making this a short story although I could see a sequel in the midst. I really hope you guys enjoyed the ended I was going to make sure that Matt was still around and I wanted to keep the whole Mello serving justice plot with the help of Matt in play, it would have been strange if they lived normal lives completley free of trouble since trouble just seems to suit them. Thank you again to everyone that Followed/ Favourited and especially to everyone who reviewed I LOVE stalker reviews that make my day, you guys fucking rock! love ya's!_


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